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Un viaje hacia la noche de los almacenes
La escritora Luz Vítolo se dispuso a dejar la comodidad de la ciudad para sacar a pasear a una amiga belga recién llegada al país. El plan: visitar Roque Pérez, un pueblo muy de campo, muy tradicional, a ciento treinta kilómetros de la urbe. La crónica nos deja una pregunta divertida: ¿quién es más extranjera en el campo argentino: la chica belga o la porteña?
«Saqué un pasaje a Buenos Aires desde Río tres días. Espero que estarás». El mensaje llega unos días antes de Año Nuevo, mi amiga belga viajó a Brasil por trabajo y extendió su estadía para visitarme. La última vez que nos vimos fue hace dos años. Me quedé con ella unos días en Gante. Me llevó a castillos e iglesias góticas, me hizo comer un millón de papas fritas (el plato nacional de Bélgica) y tomar ginebra en un bar de ciento cincuenta años.
Me pide que organice algo divertido para cuando venga. Si me hubiera avisado con más tiempo podríamos haber viajado. La belga conoce la Argentina mejor que yo. En los dos años y monedas que duró su maestría recorrió casi todo el país. No sé dónde llevarla, tres días no dan para mucho y enero en Buenos Aires no es lo mejor.
Nos subimos a la combi en el Alto Palermo y la belga habla los ciento treinta kilómetros que nos separan de nuestro destino: el campo del abuelo de mi primo segundo, la mejor invitación que pude conseguir en tan poco tiempo. Ella habla tan bien español que hasta puede ser muy graciosa. Lo único que no domina es la entonación cantada del «boludo». En sus labios parece un insulto.
Llegamos a lo de mi primo a la tarde con tiempo suficiente para meternos en el tanque australiano y tomarnos una cerveza mientras vemos cómo atardece. Después de una siesta, nos preparamos para ir a la «Noche de los Almacenes», el intento del lugar para distinguirse de todos los otros pueblos del cordón ganadero de la Provincia de Buenos Aires. El artilugio, que ya lleva siete años, ahora hasta sale en el diario.
Mientras la belga se pinta, trato de bajar la nota para mostrársela, pero ese día internet no anda y los datos llegan esporádicos según bajo qué árbol estés parado. Lo máximo que planeo hacer a nivel producción es desenredarme el pelo que está duro por la pileta. Salvo por los brillos de la remera, la belga está bastante discreta. Me preocupa que se vea demasiado extranjera. Le sugiero que cambie las sandalias de taco por zapatillas. Me dan ganas de sacarle los anteojos y hacerla menos rubia.
Manejamos veinticinco kilómetros para llegar del campo al pueblo. A pesar de que está oscuro, la belga desentona. Algo en su cara ilumina la noche con su extranjerismo. La belga es como un faro que acentúa mi sentimiento de turista. Es fácil darse cuenta quiénes no son de la zona: los motoqueros que vinieron en caravana, los jóvenes de Capital que, por alguna razón, tienen la misma gorra, y nosotras. La sensación es la de caer a un casamiento al que no fuiste invitado.
Mi primo me cuenta que los niños albinos que corretean por el pueblo comparten el mismo padre, pero no hay dos que compartan madre. En un pool genético de cuatrocientos habitantes no sería extraño que en cincuenta años el pueblo estuviera dominado por el albinismo. Esa sería una gran excusa para armar una fiesta nacional.
Por suerte, la belga se toma vacaciones de su vegetarianismo. La única opción de comida es sándwich de carne (el corte que quieras). Cada vez que nos vemos, me pregunta a cuánto está el pasaje de colectivo, la empanada y el choripán. La belga vivió en Buenos Aires en la época en que conseguir monedas para tomarse el bondi era un problema. Después me recuerda todo lo que se podía comprar con cien pesos en Almagro. Odio ese juego.
Nos sentamos en una mesa cerca de la pista para ver a las nenas de la escuela de danza bailar un trap con una letra poco apropiada. Luego, a la profesora que baila sola al ritmo de una canción que no se entiende si es árabe o folklórica. La plata que Cultura puso para el evento se luce. Hay escenario, buen equipo de sonido, banderines y un generador ruidoso.
Caminamos por la principal hacia el próximo almacén, queda al lado de los antiguos surtidores de nafta. De corte más tradicional, hay alguien payando debajo de unas luces rosadas. Nos asomamos al almacén para que la belga vea cómo es por dentro. También es mi primera vez ahí, pero sé que a ella le va a producir «algo» y a mí no me va a importar. Con su erre gangosa le pide a alguien que nos saque una foto a los tres y pregunta si podemos pasar detrás del mostrador. Nuestra cámara no es la única que nos fotografía.
La belga se gana un fernet por su simpatía. Lo compartimos de camino al tercer almacén, el de la punta. Queda a una cuadra. Según nuestro guía, es el bar de trampa. Tiene el escenario más modesto, pero la música fuerte. El show está a cargo de un amigo de la casa que canta cumbias desconocidas sobre una pista con coros. En un pueblo tan chico, elegir a cuál de los tres puestos ir esa noche es un juego de lealtades.
Algunas parejas se acercan a la pista, que es la calle misma, y bailan pegados dando vueltas en círculo. La belga quiere que bailemos como lo haríamos en una fiesta, pero algo del código de la pista me inhibe. Es de a dos, abrazados y pareja hombre-mujer. Pronto, consigue a alguien para dar vueltas mientras mi primo y yo tomamos una cerveza al costado. Él mira con ojos tranquilos, de la misma manera que debe mirar a las vacas en el campo. Elimino algo de mi incomodidad haciendo videítos cortos que no puedo mandar a nadie porque no hay señal. No sé si nos divertimos, es un evento correcto sin demasiado entusiasmo. Igual tiramos hasta las doce.
El desayuno del día siguiente es interrumpido por los ladridos de una jauría que rodea la casa. Por la ventana, vemos a los perros trenzados en una persecución. Algo que no llegamos a ver golpea contra el mosquitero. Corremos al ventanal. Nos cuesta entender la escena. Los perros le muerden los talones a un animal que no podemos nombrar. Parece un hámster gigante. Lo acorralan contra la casa, pero el animal pega patadas y logra abrirse camino.
Cuando veo al gaucho local llegar con el rifle en la mano entiendo por qué los perros no lo atacaron. La escena se sale de cuadro y le digo a la belga que salgamos. Acá sí hay algo para ver. El gaucho sostiene al carpincho. Antes de degollarlo, nos mira. Lo hace despacio mientras los perros saltan alrededor. Parece un espectáculo contratado: «Real Life in The Pampas». La belga pega un gritito ahogado y putea en flamenco. El animal se desangra por pulsos hasta que muere. El hombre lo abre al medio. Descarta los intestinos y el hígado. Están tan llenos de parásitos que las vísceras se mueven como si fuera un monstruo de una película de terror que sale en busca de otro cuerpo para habitar.
Mi primo saluda a Carlos, puestero de un campo vecino, quien nos cuenta que el carpincho es joven y que debido a la seca cada vez se ven más por la zona. La belga se retira indignada cuando Carlos enumera lo que va a hacer con todas las partes del animal. Nos pide que le cuidemos el cadáver mientras va a buscar el tractor para acarrearlo. Mi primo se aburre rápido, dice que los perros no lo van a tocar, que se va para adentro. Yo me quedo mirando la panza abierta, los dientes que asoman y la sangre que se escurre en el pasto. Pienso en el cuchillo, en las manos ensangrentadas, en la boina también roja. Estoy excitada por el espectáculo de vida y muerte. Pienso, también, que para apreciar esto, hay que ser de acá.
Otras historias de extranjeros
Crónica periodística

Una larga caminata en Bolivia entre fogatas y barricadas
Guillermo Movia es un lector histórico de Orsai y además un amigo de la casa, que desde hace casi un año vive en Bolivia. Hace unos días atravesó a pie un camino plagado de barricadas para llegar al aeropuerto de El Alto. En esta nota nos describe el clima y el paisaje de un país en alerta, atravesado por la crisis política.
Viajes y turismo

Veinte cosas que piensa un tano cuando pisa la Argentina
Antonio Moschella es napolitano y trabajó como corresponsal en Buenos Aires durante casi un año. Le preguntamos qué ve un italiano cuando llega a un país que es un calco borroneado del suyo.
Viajes y turismo

Veinte consejos de una bailarina rusa para viajar a la Argentina
María Kolmakova es bailarina en San Petersburgo y esta es su tercera visita turística a la Argentina. Nos cuenta qué le gusta de este país y, sobre todo, qué consejos le daría a sus amigos rusos que quieren venir de vacaciones.
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Masajes en Chiang Mai: las manos de una presa
Antes de visitar Tailandia, la recomendación era siempre la misma: probar sus masajes. Y un poco por curiosidad, nuestra cronista se sumergió en un viaje íntimo al centro de la prisión de Chiang Mai. Y allí, mientras las vértebras se acomodaban una a una, comenzaron a salir a la luz sus sentimientos. No se pierdan esta historia de Alexandra Correa, en la voz de Lula Krasnov.
Relato de ficción

Un viaje al interior de Roberto Gómez Bolaños
¿Qué pasa cuando un escritor uruguayo y un ilustrador argentino se ponen de acuerdo para coquetear con la teletransportación? Un delirio. Esta es la primera entrega de un experimento que tiene a Nacho Alcuri en el papel del uruguayo que escribe y a Gustavo Sala como el argentino que ilustra.
Crónica narrativa

Un país de la mente
Nadie sabe qué tiene Costa Rica, pero todo el mundo adora ese país. Le preguntamos a un poeta de allí, Luis Chaves, y su respuesta fue algo así como «a mí no me gusta tanto».

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