Querido Juan, perdón por el retraso
Un escrito sobre la cama sin hacer. Getty.


Audio RevistaOrsai.com Querido Juan, perdón por el retraso

Esta es la triste historia de un escritor lleno de energía que le escribe cartas a otro, que nunca responde porque es un desganado. Hasta que un año después, el desganado encuentra todas las cartas juntas y decide contestar. El escritor lleno de energía es Juan Sklar y el desganado, Casciari.

La primera carta de Juan está fechada el 7 de enero de 2019 y empieza así: «Querido Hernán, estoy un poco angustiado. Tengo la sensación constante de que mi vida pende de un hilo. Mi mujer dice que no puedo vivir así, que no tengo motivos y que, incluso si los tuviera, debería vivir confiando en que no se va a ir todo a la mierda. Menos si no tengo una verdadera razón para pensarlo. Hoy me dijo que quizás deberían medicarme. Puede que tenga razón, no lo sé». Aquí está la carta completa, que termina así: «Escribir esta carta me hizo muy bien. Se me pasó un poco la angustia. Si te parece, te voy a mandar una carta como esta cada semana, o cada vez que lo necesite, de acá hasta que vuelva de la India. Necesito escribir para atravesar la vida y en estos días también necesito una buena excusa para sentarme a escribir. Te mando un abrazo, Juan».

Juan, querido. Tengo esta carta tuya desde el año pasado y no te la contesté nunca, me quiero matar, parezco Josefina Licitra. Y ahora veo que después de esta me mandaste once cartas más, una por semana, y no te respondí ninguna. Creo (por un lado) que nuestra amistad es muy desigual, Juan. Vos hacés un esfuerzo enorme para que nos mantengamos en contacto y yo te devuelvo indiferencia y desprecio. Y eso no está bien.

Por otro lado, qué personalidad intensa. Escribir once cartas sin recibir respuesta es inquietante. Bueno, Juan (te digo así porque no sé tu apellido). Voy a leer la siguiente carta que me mandaste. Perdoname el delay.

Un abrazo grande, Hernán.

La segunda carta de Juan está fechada el 14 de enero de 2019 y empieza así: «Querido Hernán, perdón por la carta de la semana pasada, medio oscura, medio llorona. Me vine unos días a la costa y ya me siento mejor. ¿A vos también te angustia el cansancio?». Aquí está la carta completa, que termina así: «Me queda escribir. Que no me da ni media respuesta, pero me sosiega. Me queda mi cuaderno y me quedan estas cartas. Mi vida es el mismo desbarajuste de siempre pero después de escribir  me siento mejor. Todo se vuelve más pequeño, más manejable. Te mando un abrazo, Juan».

Querido Juan, con un año entero de distancia —desde tu enero de 2019 hasta este, mi enero de 2020— tomé la decisión de responder estas cartas tuyas durante todo el verano. Mi  verano.

Vos escribís cuando tu hijo Goran se duerme, y yo escribo con mi hija Pipa a upa. Las dos versiones son la misma versión; es lo mismo todo. Voy a ver si puedo contestarte estas cartas con mi hija Pipa a upa desde la semana que viene.

Te mando un abrazo.

Las respuestas de las cartas a Juan continúan la próxima semana.


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